When you stop to think about it, there really is not much that separates those who have autism from those who do not. It comes down to being human first, and the rest should not matter when it comes to how we should treat people. Having autism should not discount a person from living life to the fullest, and who are we to stand in the way of that? I am a firm believer in the good human mantra of being kind and doing good in the world. It should not be a hard concept to grasp, but too often, I am seeing people struggle in this area of life. I love the image created by the comparisons made between the reality of life with autism versus what outsiders see. It is powerful to see and know the difference. Beautiful. It is not always what we think beauty should be. A twinkle in an eye or a smile that brightens the room means more than outward appearance. Those are two things that should never be degraded or taken away from someone. Real beauty comes from within a person and shows through the portals of the eyes and smile. Challenged. Life is not easy with autism or any other disability (I use that term loosely). They meet obstacles just like you and me, and they may have to tackle it differently, but that should not take anything away from the triumph. We all face the hardships of life whether we like it or not, but in no way is someone at a disadvantage just because they treat the world differently. Overwhelmed. Routines and consistency are two things we all like to strive for, but for those who have autism, this is a necessity. I hate straying from my daily routines and comforts, but this could be a detriment to the flow of the day for our friends with autism. The slightest shift from what they are used to can trigger a downhill ride for the day. So, while they struggle to go with the flow, we can, and we should if it makes someone’s day go a little smoother. Choice. No one opts to have autism. It just happens. While some choice in the matter is nonexistent, there is a choice to be made about how a person deals with it and how we respond to the needs of someone who has autism. This is the point when we should do whatever we can to make life easier for them by having accepting perspectives. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2018
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Limitations are put on people before abilities are even recognized. Positive thoughts and some effort go a long way when it comes to seeing milestones being met and achievements being made for a kid who has autism. Parents would go to the ends of the earth to hear their child’s first words or see them excel at something that has been a challenge for years. Those triumphs mean something, and they should never go unnoticed. Celebrations may not always be the first thing that comes to mind when discussing autism. In fact, some people may not like to talk about it to begin with, but I think it should be talked about and celebrated. First, by talking about its presence in this world, and more importantly a person who has it, awareness and advocacy take place. Second, through celebrating a person and the accomplishments they have made in spite of the limitations an outside factor has placed on them is showing the world a person can be more than the challenges they face. We may be quick to brush off the delayed milestones of someone with autism because it supposedly comes with the territory. But in reality, we need to take a step back and evaluate how awesome it is that a person climbed a hard climb to reach that milestone. When society says something cannot happen, that is a fantastic opportunity to stand up and show the world that having autism is not stopping anyone from defying the odds. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2018 We are quick to judge a book by its cover. We do the same when we see someone who looks different from us or does something a little differently too. Society has a weird way of making it okay to see different as being wrong. I hate that. Nothing irks me more than people seeing other people and just because they do not understand something, it somehow gives them a free pass to tease or ignore another human being. I do not get it, and I never will. What happened to being kind to one another? People with autism march to the beat of their own drum. There is nothing wrong with that. I think we should all take our cue from them and join the parade. Life may be drastically different for a family maneuvering through life with autism compared to a typical family, but for both, they have found their normal. To the outsiders looking in, we need to be respectful of the accommodations that must be met to keep our friends on the spectrum happy and healthy. They deserve the same opportunities to live carefree and happy as we do, and the best thing we can do to ensure this happening is to view them as a person first and acknowledge the difference that comes with autism second. Life would be boring if we all looked and acted the same. Our world would be dull. We each bring something unique to the table. There is a special place for all of us to learn and grow in this life, and we had better start by seeing that people with autism are more than the label. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2018 We are so set on going through the motions of quick conversations in passing that we forget to listen to and care about what others are saying. It seems like there is an invisible timer ticking away the time for what we consider a suitable time spent talking to someone in passing. Sure, our time is valuable, but so is what someone is trying to say. And especially for a person with autism, the fact that they are attempting to be verbal deserves someone’s undivided attention. We like to think we run on a New York minute timetable, but we owe it to those around us to respect the time they need to communicate and listen to what they are trying to say. Kids on the spectrum are wonderfully unique in all they do. Communicating is no different. It can be one of the most daunting tasks for kids and even adults face when on the spectrum. While some may be social butterflies, others are unable to communicate the way you and I do. Imagine what it would be like if you could not express your wants and needs, desires and pains, and likes and dislikes. Frustration would be spewing from our ears like lava. But for families who may not have a verbal child with autism, they always find a way to make it work. That is the key in many situations dealing with someone on the spectrum. So what if things have to be done differently?! Communicating does not have to be orthodox. People communicate all over this world in different ways, and it is time we start acknowledging the unconventional ways of communicating. Whether it is flashcards, AAC devices, sign language, or whatever else works for a special person on the spectrum, I would hope we gain the patience to listen. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2018 They say every cloud has a silver lining. We meet people who are going through this, that, or another thing. Often, we give some message of empty hope and sympathy. But, for families who are dealing with a diagnosis of autism, going through the motions of the previous scenario makes it worse. Nothing about autism is cookie-cutter or even the same for everyone, so to pretend like we know how the parents are feeling or to throw out some random treatment that worked for a cousin’s neighbor’s sister’s kid is wholly unnecessary. The best things we can give a person who has autism or a family of a child who has autism are support and compassion. Autism looks different for each person. Some days may be sunny and bright, while others will be thunderous and storming. There is not a guidebook that walks us through how to deal with autism. What we can do is celebrate the victories, big and small, that took years to achieve and encourage them through the days when giving up seems easier than riding out the storm. The road will not be easy. After storms come rainbows, and they are beautiful just like the people who have autism. We cannot have rainbows without some rain and thunder first. People who have autism, especially kiddos, will throw tantrums when their shirt is too tight, or their breakfast was not the way they are used to having it, but behind those tears and shouts, there is a heart that is full of love. A love that is unwavering because to them, they know no difference between the challenges and the victories. To them, this is the life they live and is nothing short of ordinary. And maybe from the outside looking in, it seems like a mess, but for them, it is theirs to live and love. They march to the beat of their own drum. In a simple world, we would all be better off if only we could learn to dance in the rain. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2018 |
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