It has been a couple of great weeks. Between the time change and it trying to feel like spring, I have seen a difference in myself and felt better too. There has even been some extra time for self-care, and I took full advantage of that. I cannot believe this semester is almost over. For some time before Spring Break, it felt like it was dragging on, and the end would never come. Now, we are in the final countdown, and things are going along pretty smooth. I think it is safe to say that all of my friends and I are looking forward to finishing this semester and trying to crank things out to make the end seem a little closer. So far, that philosophy seems to be working. Sometimes, I feel guilty taking that extra time for myself or being away from the books for an extended time, but if it comes down to sanity or getting a few extra glances at information, chances are I am going to do something to keep myself in the right headspace. Doing all the work without having some fun makes for a long semester. Even if it is taking the extra time to make something really good for dinner and watching a favorite show, I count that time as a win and thoroughly enjoy it. It makes the snap of reality sting less, and honestly, it is the small things in life that sometimes makes everything better. I realize this chapter of life will be my one and only like it. I have one chance to make the best of it, and I had to break my own habit of putting all the work before any ounce of fun. I have since made an effort to let myself do more fun things after class or on the weekends. I was beginning to feel like a hermit who only left the house for class and grocery shopping. While I am still queen of the homebodies, I can still have a good time. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2019
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This semester a group of us has been getting together midweek for a Bible study. As long and as hard as the weeks sometimes feels, being together and spending time in the Word makes everything feel okay. Time has been the enemy this year, and it always feels like there is hardly time to breathe, let alone do anything else unrelated to school. While we are sitting in a coffee shop or at my apartment, it feels like time stands still and nothing else matters. I always feel so refreshed on Wednesdays to finish out the week strong, and it gives me something to look forward to when the Mondays hit hard. I am thankful that our Bible study started because I know this semester would have been even harder without having strong supports at school. It can sometimes feel lonely when it seems like no one else is struggling the same way you are. But, with forming a new bond with friends who are so much alike and have the same faith as me has proven to make a huge difference in how I approach the week. It is in the small places that we know God will find us and never leave us. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2019 Friday was International Women’s Day. I am sure we all had different ways of celebrating the day. I spent most of it being miserably sick on the couch, but while I laid there, I scrolled through social media and read what the day meant to my friends and other people I follow. I loved reading stories of empowerment and encouragement. The best thing we can do for others is supporting them in whatever they are passionate about. We may not understand or see the bigger picture, but they do. We have something unique to offer to the world, and we should be proud of that. Pioneers and trailblazers made it possible for women to have a role in history. Our stories continue, and there will always be a place for us as long as we make a way. We must always hold onto our place in this world. Too many women long before us made huge sacrifices to ensure future generations could achieve what they could not. Times may change, but our strength will only get stronger. Trends will come and go, but knowing your worth never goes out of style. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2019 Chasing after dreams and trying your best to achieve them is not for the faint of heart. We always hear success stories, but often, details of obstacles and facing struggles are excluded for fear of invalidating the final result. Those obstacles make our stories instead of breaking them. They are the unsung heroes responsible for shaping us into the people we grow into being. I hit a point that no one could have ever prepared me for, and it felt like I was drowning. It is scary to look at your life and see it pass by but not feel like you are living it anymore. When I say it felt like everything exploded into a million little pieces, it may come across as an exaggeration, but at that moment (or weeks), this was my reality. I got bogged down by the whole picture again and lost sight of taking it one piece at a time. Staying consumed by deadlines and putting my best foot forward in everything became my worst enemy. Something I used to thrive on proved to backfire into burnout. Let me be super real here. Talking about the vulnerable moments of life are sometimes taken as weakness, but I think it is important to know it happens to others, so someone else knows they are not alone. When I started going to school when I was little, I had bouts of anxiety. Through the years, I was able to hold it at bay and it never really bothered me again until recently. This year threw a lot of changes my way so that paired with the high expectations I have for myself, my ability to sort my brain out and process things flew out the window, and my anxiety was brewing. I tried to ignore it for a long time, and that just made it worse. I have since taken a healthier approach to deal with the stress and the pressure. But, it is essential to recognize those emotions and not let them consume you as I did. I did not like the feeling of waking up in a panic or doing the things I love in autopilot mode just to consider it complete. I went through the motions to survive, but now I am feeling back to myself and dusting off my passion again for the reason I put myself in this stress-wad two years to reach the goals I have been working on for so long. No matter what is going on in life, there are going to be these rough patches and storms. It took hitting bottom for me to realize that life curveballs are not there to necessarily break you, but to make you stronger. Life has a funny way of teaching you lessons. While I surely did not enjoy this one, I appreciate having been there and figuring out how to paddle in the storm. Stay Curious, Kayla ©Inquisitive Perspectives 2019 |
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